Strategies that you can implement

Like many new skills, it takes time and practice for children to refine them. It also requires a consistent and shared approach from practitioners and parents/carers alike. For some children with SEND, they may have specific strategies in place as part of a targeted support approach to meet their individual needs in relation to their personal, social and emotional development. However, in terms of a generalised approach to supporting all children’s self-regulation, there are many every-day opportunities and strategies that you can implement:

• Play (planned and child-led, particularly role-play)
• Books and songs
• Providing clear, predictable routines and expectations, which are developmentally appropriate
• Role modelling
• Working in partnership with parents

And one of the most important strategies is to talk, acknowledge, and label children’s feelings and emotions. Children may not have the language or cognitive ability to understand  or express what they are feeling. As a practitioner, it is your role to help children to identify and express what they are feeling. It is not always appropriate to do this in the moment, particularly if they are very upset or angry. However, once a child is calm, you can revisit an earlier situation and talk through it with them. Make sure you reassure the child that it is ‘okay’ to have those feelings (such as being angry or sad) and talk about how they can manage and respond to their feelings. It is important to help children to understand how to respond appropriately to their emotions.

Summary

Children need to learn how to self-regulate and require the support of others to develop the skills to do so effectively. As a practitioner, you have a significant role in supporting children’s self-regulation and you need to ensure that you are responsive to their developmental needs. Having a good understanding of the factors which can both inhibit and promote a child’s ability to self-regulate will help provide a firm foundation for this.

Some children will have specific difficulties in regulating their emotions, feelings and behaviours and require direct support from you to manage this. Some children may need only a short period of support and intervention, while others may require it for much longer. It is important to know each child’s developmental needs and implement the appropriate level of support.

Children will often learn to regulate their emotions and behaviours through watching and responding to adults’ modelling self-regulation. Therefore, it is important that you are providing daily opportunities for children to watch and interact with you, where you can role model and talk about their emotions, feelings and behaviour directly to them. This can additionally be done through your interactions with other practitioners in the room.

We often praise children for positive behaviour, but how often do we do this to our colleagues? Simply by saying ‘thank you’ or ‘that is a great activity you did with the children’ out loud to your colleagues, not only supports a good working environment but also provides a further opportunity for children to see active role-modelling in practice.

I want to conclude this series with a point for reflection, something for you to take away and spend some time thinking about. The ability to self- regulate is not just restricted to the children we work with. How we are feeling as practitioners/professionals can impact upon the success of co-regulation with children. Like children, there are factors which additionally impact upon you, for example, if you are tired, unwell or feeling stressed, your capacity to manage your own feelings and respond to others could be reduced. It is important to recognise and respond appropriately to your own emotions and feelings and take steps to provide yourself with some self-care or seek support from others if you need to.